Come, my dreamland citizens. You’ve had a lengthy ride in the naptime car aboard the Snoozy-Chug Express, disembarked from the SlumberBurg Station and are deep within SleepVille, where White Cosby reins supreme from a throne of hay and goose down. I know, I know – you toss and turn. Your brain goes a mile a minute, discussing and dissecting every waking moment of your dismal day. You flip the pillow, you change your underpants. You JUST CAN’T SLEEP ON YOUR OWN (not without dangerous medication, anyway – try it if you like). But White Cosby knows the secrets of successful sleep, and he’s here to share them with you. Because… CHRIST. You look terrible.
As White Cosby relaxes you with his soothing voice, easing you into coma-like slumber, you’ll receive the calming answers to life’s big questions, such as:
- COFFEE OR TEA?!
- Should I pry into why my boyfriend demanded we leave the movies 50 mintues in?
- When is it appropriate to wear a winter coat (of a dead person)?
- If my husband takes his ED meds while travelling, does that mean he’s cheating?
- How should I feel about twerking?
And White Cosby, master of unconsciousness and sleep faces the ultimate expanse of nothingness with his World Famous White Cosby Movie Review of Gravity! Slip on your polar-bear-fur slippers, get into White Cosby’s patented Sleep-Aid Nutrigenous Goo Chamber, and give it a listen!